Wrath Of The Titans - A Review

2.5 Stars - entirely meh

Anyone else want to see the Zeus and Hades buddy movie?

Wrath of the Titans is a really dull film with action that isn't tense or exciting, a boring main character... and yet still has some stuff that would have been cool if it was in something better.

The supporting cast are decent, mainly Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes and Bill Nighy, but Sam Worthington is quite dull, though that's more the fault of the character than anything else.

Some stuff is kinda cool, like the labyrinth, the Chimera and Zeus and Hades bitchslapping monsters left right and centre; but it doesn't make up for it being such an uninspired dull film.

Hello, I'll be your highlight for this movie

To sum up, give it a miss...

The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists! - A Review

5 Stars - Hilarious Fun

Aardman making a film about pirates with a who's who of British character actors? Sold

The Pirates is an example of a great family film, with Aardman once again showing how not to talk down to children and put in plenty of jokes that only the parents will get, though keeping enough good slapstick to entertain the really little kids.

This film is wonderfully animated, though not in the traditional Aardman style it is done in a way that is more efficient and looks just as good, if not better, than the style used in Wallace and Gromit and Chicken Run; and this animation is probably the best looking they've done to date.

The cast is fantastic, Hugh Grant makes the central character, The Pirate Captain, very likeable and even quite relateable in the sad bits. on top of that the film has Martin Freeman, Imelda Staunton, Russel Tovey, Brendan Gleeson, David Tennant, Brian Blessed and more; all of them being very funny.

A very jolly crew

In short the best family film so far this year. Go see it.

The Hunger Games - A Review

4 Stars - Promising

 

Other than the huge waste of Toby Jones... it's pretty darn good.

Hunger games is based on the first of a trilogy of books that I have not read. So I can't compare it as an adaptation.

It is a film about 24 children being forced to battle each other to the death for people's entertainment.

The film is very competently put together and doesn't treat the younger audience like they're idiots, which is a very important thing to me, as there is so much crap nowadays that doesn't think kids can think.

The performances were decent throughout, I found Jennifer Lawrence to be initially dull, but once the story got really going it went away and she became very easy to relate to, and it is very nice to see a strong, intelligent female character.

However the film stealing roles are Woody Harrelson and Stanley Tucci, both of whom bring a lot of wonderful comedy to the film which at times is well needed to break the tension.

Some of the action scenes have way too much shaky cam, which makes it difficult to tell just what the hell is going on, which is something of a negative.

Where were all my lines?

I ate them with the rest of the scenery

 

To sum up this is a promising start to what will no doubt be an entertaining film trilogy, well worth seeing.

We Bought A Zoo - A Review

3.5 Stars - Nice

 

well to be honest... d'aaawwww

We Bought A Zoo tells the true story of Benjamin Mee, who bought a zoo... that's pretty much it.

Matt Damon is great as Benjamin, coming off as very charming and clearly trying very hard to be a good father. You want him to do well and want him to get through his issues.

The kids in the film are great, with the teenage son Dylan (Colin Ford) acting out and hating the radical change in his life and seven year old Rosie (Maggie Elizabeth Jones) being continuously adorable to the point that nearly everything she does makes you want to smile.

I have to say though it is kind of hard to figure out what age range this is for, as it would be quite possibly fairly boring for young children... as made evident by the little kid sat behind me all the way through who wouldn't shut up... so perhaps it is more for kids of about 10-early teens. That said there is some fun stuff for grown ups too.

Also, did they have to move the story to America? The real guy did it in Dartmoor...

Putting Matt Damon in this Cage was definitely a good idea

In Conclusion We Bought A Zoo is a nice heartfelt family film.

 

Contraband - A Review

3 Stars - okay...

 

Marky-Mark smuggles stuff... and the film takes no standpoint on it...

Contraband is about Mark Wahlberg going to smuggle across counterfeit money to pay off the money his brother in law owes to some gangsters.

The film is pretty dull, and the characters are all just sort of... okay. But I suppose it doesn't really do anything wrong per se.

However it fails to take any view on whether smuggling is a good or a bad thing, nor does it give much of an actual look into how people smuggle things in the real world... either of these could have made for a more interesting dynamic than the what would you do to protect your family? angle they tried for and failed to hit because they never made smuggling look like it was that difficult or morally wrong.

I hear you're doing a movie with Justin Beiber... sucks to be you Marky-Mark

To sum up, Contraband is okay, but not really worth rushing out to see 

The Raven - A Review

3.5 Stars - A Whole Heap of Fun

And my soul from out that shadow, that lies floating on the floor, shall be lifted, nevermore.

The Raven is a fun film where Edgar Allan Poe (John Cusack) solves a series of grisly murders inspired by his stories.

The plot is simple and effective, the characters memorable and enjoyable, especially Cusack as Poe, who gives the role a nice mix of dignity and despair.

Some of the scenes are very grisly in nature, especially the scene where the Killer re-enacts The Pit and The Pendulum and The Tell-Tale Heart stuff throughout.

This film is definitely worth seeing if you want a bit of simple fun with some nicely gruesome bits.

John Carter - A Review

2.5 Stars - Waste of Promising Ideas and Cast

What a waste of Mark Strong... and Dominic West... and Ciaran Hinds... and Willem Dafoe... and... wait Bryan Cranston is in it too? damn it!

John Carter tells the story of a man sent to Mars and gets the super power of jumping.

This film could have been quite good, but there was just a little too much of it. There is a lot of clear thought put into it, the culture of the Martians is displayed very well, and is very interesting. However the characters are pretty boring and at 2 hours and 10 minutes it is way too long.

A major flaw in this film was the framing device of John Carter's nephew reading about the adventure in a diary, so we know that he will get out of it alive, therefore there is no reason to get invested, which is a shame.

If they had cut out a few scenes and fleshed out some of the characters a bit more this could have been a very entertaining film.

Reefer Madness - A Review

4 Stars - Fun

Jesus signs a lounge number? I'm sold...

Reefer Madness is a musical comedy based on a 30s public information film about Marijuana, and it is hilarious.

The songs are catchy and funny, with particular favourites being Listen To Jesus, Jimmy and The Stuff.

The acting is wonderfully over the top, as it is intended to be and the result is a very very funny film.

All The Pieces Matter... An Overview Of The Wire

I'll start by saying, I enjoyed the Wire throughout, though I do have criticisms of it.

I felt the characters were all engaging and all brilliantly acted, especially Bubbles as played by Andre Royo, Stringer Bell as played by Idris Elba and D'angelo as played by Larry Gilliard Jr.

 

It takes some time to get into, it took until a scene in the third episode to convince me it was worth watching fully. Every series starts off slow and it also remained slow in several places, but when the plot got going it was worth it.

It is almost completely uncompromising in it's attempts to accurately portray the realism of the Baltimore Police Department and the drug crews on the streets, and while overall this gives the show a good standing, for my tastes it was a bit too realistic, I would sometimes have prefered some more conventional moments in it, but that's just my opinion.

I would understand if people were put off by the language used, again it is to add to the realism, but to me I think the word Fuck was overused, it could have had a lot more power behind it if it was only used at certain extreme moments to make it seem more of a big deal. Though I can appreciate that it was more realistic their way and was right for their characters.

So overall I reccomend the Wire, as when it comes right down to it, it is an entertaining TV show that kept my attention for all 5 series, and when it comes down to it, isn't that good enough?

This Means War - A Review

2 Stars - Disappointingly Dull

So you take a fairly decent concept for a comedy, then take out all the funny except for one scene and you get this...

Two spy best friends date the same girl and hilarity doesn't ensue...

This film could have been pretty good, the concept made it look fun and the cast is pretty strong. However the jokes fall flat, the action scenes are uninspired and it is just boring.

That's all I have to say except that Tom Hardy going all Rambo on a bunch of 12 year olds at paintballing is pretty funny...

so yeah, give this one a miss

Wanderlust - A Review

3.5 Stars - surprisingly good

Old people nudists... ew...

Wanderlust tells the story of Mike from Friends and Rachael from Friends as a married couple who stumble upon a hippy commune and decide to try living there.

I was not overly enthusiastic before going into this film, and I was pleasantly surprised. The characters are enjoyable, the jokes are funny and the film has just enough heart to make it a bit more than a lame comedy.

There is however one section that was horrible and not funny... at all... Paul Rudd is attempting to psyche himself up to go have sex with one of the women in the commune and he talks to himself in the mirror and just starts spouting vulgar offensive nonsense. This is not comedy, it never has been and never will be funny, and people need to learn this, if it weren't for this scene I'd probably have given this film 4 stars. But once again modern comedies don't get how to make talking about sex funny.

But that scene aside it is genuinely very enjoyable and I'd say worth a watch, if nothing else for the scene near the start with the HBO executives and the nudist author/wine maker...